Dear Jeni

What is the best way to cure the holiday blues (that does not
invove cats)?  I have tried wassailing, hewing a yule log for
the servants, and hiding a pickle in the Christmas tree.  I
have even purchased a fat goose and given it to an
urchin, yet I cannot shake the urge to sigh and recline on the
fainting couch.  Do rush, as I must bear up the strength to
make figgy pudding soon.

Yours Most Humbly,
Mrs. Astor

*********************************************************

My dear Mrs. A---,

By all means, do take yourself unto a better world forthwith! 
And be sure to leave your earthly possessions to some urchin
more worthy of them than yourself.  The preparing of figgy
pudding is not intended as punishment, and to view it as such
suggests a severe and permanent impediment of the spirit of
Christmas.

Signed,
a most festive Jeni