Dear Jeni,

Professor Water is a fraud! Yesterday at my work, the swimming pool caught on fire. Ha.

Erudite Luddite

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Dear Erudite,

You seem confused about the nature of water. Water does not burn. In fact, burning can actually produce water vapor, such as in the combustion of hydrogen and oxygen.

That being said, water will change its form in the presence of heat, changing from a liquid to a gas (vapor) through a mysterious and largely unheard-of process that specialists call "evaporation."

It is, however, possible for a swimming pool to catch fire, though it is not actually the water that is burning (though some of the water may certainly be evaporating). In my day, crazy college students would pour kerosene in campus fountains and light the fountains afire. Note the use of kerosene. The water would not burn on its own. And indeed, the fire went quickly out because the kerosene promptly burned and all that was left around it (i.e., water) would not burn.

For a fun science experiment, try taking a bucket of plain water (no chemicals, kerosene, etc., in it) and dropping a lit match into it. Then add kerosene and try again. (Warning: experiment may be dangerous and may result in serious injury or death. Do not attempt at home.)

Jeni